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What's your best 'that was dumb' moment involving your 5 ton?

Buffalobwana

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Frisco Texas
Neglected to hook up air lines to the dead truck to build up air pressure to release brakes before attempting to pull it out of mud hole it had been in for a week. Wondered why it was so difficult to pull it out of its hole. (I was in Alaska and Nobody, and I mean nobody for any amount of money would come help this guy).

01550D35-0BA9-44BE-A599-B91FC23D4C84.jpg
 

cwedge411

Member
57
5
8
Location
Boston/Ma
How about testing brakes, breaking the rear torque arm in the process having the rear axle slide back, rear driveshaft fall off.

Then trying to back up to the shop, helicoptered the drive shaft and destroyed it.IMG_20170820_185210470.jpgIMG_20170820_181412510_HDR.jpgIMG_20170820_181344139_HDR.jpg

*edit looking at pics now*
ANDDDD going through mud and forgetting to wash it off #cement
 

71DeuceAK

Well-known member
1,492
344
83
Location
Fairbanks, Alaska
Dumb moment not quite. Stupid moment yes! M816 should not to be playing in mud pit. Played for a couple of hours and watching for any deep holes that others are staying away from. Time to leave and I cut across the side of the pit and what looked to be a hole maybe 20x20. No problem but wait why is the truck dropping like a rock and mud / sandy soil up the windshield and she is on 53's. Tighten my butt cheeks so nothing escapes and hit reverse fast. Nope not going to happen, she is stuck and I am feeling stupid so I call for help with her still running. It took one Deuce and two farm tractors to get her out. Just as she was coming out the motor that was still running started to act funny and cut out. What the heck now. Have the Deuce drag me back to higher ground and try and get her started buy putting her in gear and clutch. She is trying to run but something feels wrong and then she cut out for good. O crap better call Pete aka P&C trans. Where are you o wait I don't care where you are get your donkey up here from Tampa and get me out of here. As Pete always does, showed up winched me up on his trailer and off we went. Yes I did have to be scolded about taking the truck in the mud pit all the way home. Got home and found the problem. The dip stick was not tight and with the road draft tube deep in the wet sandy muck dip stick popped out and in ran sandy /muddy to the crank case. On inspection had sand on both sides of the oil filter so one trashed motor. Good thing I have a running takeout motor but I should have a tattoo on my forehead. "CAN'T FIX STUPID"

I'm sorry, but I laughed in a sympathetic way. I initially wanted a 5 ton strictly as a mud truck, even bone stock. If I could afford to do so, I'd admittedly be burying mine to the hood often (Purists might hate me here).

I guess just make sure everything is prepared for deep fording!
 

TechnoWeenie

Well-known member
Steel Soldiers Supporter
1,644
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Location
Nova Laboratories, WA
I let my batteries sit for too long, drained them, didn't bother checking them and just hooked up the indentured servant cable from my CUCV to my M934... Bad idea....all 4 were completely shot....

Well, one of my alternators was on its last leg, so it gave up the ghost.... but I didn't find out for about a week later because I run 2 spare 12V aux batteries... I had essentially been running off of battery for a week, heh..

Basically, killed my alt by trying to charge 4 toasted batts in my 5 ton.
 

Jbulach

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Sunman Indiana
So far only two best moments.

The first was “trusting” a MV fuel gauge. I was less than a mile away from home with 12 ton of gravel in the bed. IMG_2006.jpgThe neighbors Powerstroke to rescue!

The second was trying to follow Gimpy at Haspin. IMG_4992.jpgIMG_4993.jpg A busted fuel line 90... a rusty come-along, some rubber hose, a few beers and a lot of help, I was rigged up and good to go.
 

Bhpdbrad

Member
103
13
18
Location
Ventura County, CA
To set the scene: 4th of July Parade day.

I have the decorated 5-ton in it's staged position before the parade starts...

Everything is looking good and working well. The bed is loaded with several revelers, including myself - enjoying my patriotic, redneck country music...

I then get a "10 min out" advance notice to get ready to start as the parade is underway and I'll be cuing up soon. I immediately move to the side of the bed to climb down. I throw my leg over the back of the troop seat, and lower myself down to the rim of my rear wheel... where I step inside same to then reach the ground. That's when I hear the terrifying loud sound of air escaping from my now broken off valve that's connected to the CTIS hose. I had completely snapped the top of the air valve off by stepping on the hose climbing down.

Now it was a 'What To Do' moment as the tire was deflating quickly. Fortunately a little quick thinking came in play. I stopped the leak with a tree twig that we managed to whittle down to fit inside the valve and hold in place with some duct tape. We finished the job just as it was our turn to enter the parade.

We made it through the entire parade successfully. Afterwards, we stopped for lunch and I had a flat tire to deal with.

I learned my lesson that day to NEVER step inside the tires/wheels again.
 

71DeuceAK

Well-known member
1,492
344
83
Location
Fairbanks, Alaska
Neglected to hook up air lines to the dead truck to build up air pressure to release brakes before attempting to pull it out of mud hole it had been in for a week. Wondered why it was so difficult to pull it out of its hole. (I was in Alaska and Nobody, and I mean nobody for any amount of money would come help this guy).

View attachment 737506
Where in Alaska? Let's hear the backstory behind this one...
 

Buffalobwana

Well-known member
Steel Soldiers Supporter
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Location
Frisco Texas
Sorry, I was in Alaska at the time he got stuck and couldn’t help him. His truck was in Texas on his farm. He drove the the “shallow end” of his pond. Not so shallow it turns out. So it sat here for a week until I could come back and help him. He’s a busy man and couldn’t deal with it. Nobody would help him.

We got it out, drained fluids, and it’s fine. Got some water in one axle, but that’s it.
 
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71DeuceAK

Well-known member
1,492
344
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Location
Fairbanks, Alaska
Sorry, I was in Alaska at the time he got stuck and couldn’t help him. His truck was in Texas on his farm. He drove the the “shallow end” of his pond. Not so shallow it turns out. So it sat here for a week until I could come back and help him. He’s a busy man and couldn’t deal with it. Nobody would help him.

We got it out, drained fluids, and it’s fine. Got some water in one axle, but that’s it.
This story just sounds like something I'd do, except in Alaska! I did just acquire one so maybe I'll be adding stories to this thread at some point...
 

Buffalobwana

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Location
Frisco Texas
I will find out.

Ok, mine.

I park one of mine at an outside storage facility. One day I was doing something with engine running and the noise was bugging me, so I disengaged brake. Shut down truck and left.

Next morning I show up at 4:30am to leave, and the strong North wind has blown the truck across the yard into another guys trailer. No damage, nobody saw it.

Never happened.

Another lesson learned.
 

Buffalobwana

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Location
Frisco Texas
Yeah, that’s definitely about as likely as flying pigs exiting the back of my pants.

Ok, I’ll go.

Its possible it was left off, rolled backwards and something smashed through the back window. That’s a top ten possibility.

Your honor, given the nature of this witness, I move to declare him hostile, leaving us only one option. Start a thread allowing everyone unlimited guesses as to what did or did not supposedly happen with his parking brake that lead to him invoking his 5th amendment rights here today.

Prosecution rests. Your witness.
 

Guyfang

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Staff member
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Burgkunstadt, Germany
Today, while looking at a CAT dozer, it hit me.

Flash back to 1985. I am in Ft. Lost in the Woods, (Ft. Leonard Wood, Mo.) for the Tech part of WOC, (Warrant Officer Candidate) training. I am in a class with 16 guys who are real Combat Engineers. I am the only guy in the class who was not a REAL Combat Engineer. I did Power Generation for 12 and a half years. BUT, for the Army, its all the same. Every day we study Engineer equipment. Dozers, Bucket loaders, M88 Tank retriever, Bridge layers, what ever. Its all new to me. Everyone else sleeps during class. I study hard. One day, we come to the CAT D5, (I think) Bulldozer. I might as well be looking at a UFO. We are in the track park, and the young enlisted soldiers are starting everything up, and doing PMCS, (Preventive Maintenance, Checks and Services)

Due to being prodded by several of my classmates, I climb up on the dozer, to "check it out". Not much for controls. Simple, thinks I. One of the instructors yells to "Drive that sucker out here, and we can go over it for class"! I look around, and there aint no one but me up here, so I sit down. A young soldier climbs up and says he will take it. I said, "Nah, I got it, just tell me how to put the sucker in gear". So he does. Now, I have driven lots of things with pivot steer, so this doesn't worry me at all. We charge out at the speed of a fast melting glacier. I haul back on a lateral, and give er some gas!! And the engine seems to die. Or better said, lose power. I can hear some of you laughing now. Well, the young soldier jumps down, because he thinks I am stopping. I am looking around for something to push, pull, turn on or off, to make this pig go faster. People are now screaming at me, but I am hard hearing, and, well, everyone is screaming at me in WOC, so nothing new there. I cant find any reason this darn thing wont go fast, and about this time the screams get REAL loud and nasty. I look up. My dozer blade is about a foot and a half from the next dozer's blade. This is not good. So I do what any right minded person would do, let off the gas! All the sudden, this pig of a machine acts like its butt is on fire! The engine revs up and away we go! With a resounding metallic clang, my blade hits the other blade and breaks the blade mount off, and starts to push the other dozer off to the side. I have no earthly idea what is going on! I have tromped the darn gas pedal almost through the floor board, and let it back out, in the hopes it is just stuck, and it just goes faster!!

All the sudden, my least favorite person in the world, CW4 Ti******nen, (the School Commandant) is standing next to me screaming to "push your G** Da*n foot down on the pedal!" So I did. And the engine died down to an idle. The man didn't like me before all this transpired, and it sure didn't get better afterwards. After a loud, anger filled tirade, filled with words we cant use here, nor in church, he explained that a dozer gas pedal works the opposite way of a gas pedal on any other vehicle in the world. Well, how should I know? My punishment, was to NOT, REPEAT, NOT, drive anything else in the remaining 2 weeks of school. The guy simply didn't have any humor. I got my revenge later.
 
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71DeuceAK

Well-known member
1,492
344
83
Location
Fairbanks, Alaska
Today, while looking at a CAT dozer, it hit me.

Flash back to 1985. I am in Ft. Lost in the Woods, (Ft. Leonard Wood, Mo.) for the Tech part of WOC, (Warrant Officer Candidate) training. I am in a class with 16 guys who are real Combat Engineers. I am the only guy in the class who was not a REAL Combat Engineer. I did Power Generation for 12 and a half years. BUT, for the Army, its all the same. Every day we study Engineer equipment. Dozers, Bucket loaders, M88 Tank retriever, Bridge layers, what ever. Its all new to me. Everyone else sleeps during class. I study hard. One day, we come to the CAT D5, (I think) Bulldozer. I might as well be looking at a UFO. We are in the track park, and the young enlisted soldiers are starting everything up, and doing PMCS, (Preventive Maintenance, Checks and Services)

Due to being prodded by several of my classmates, I climb up on the dozer, to "check it out". Not much for controls. Simple, thinks I. One of the instructors yells to "Drive that sucker out here, and we can go over it for class"! I look around, and there aint no one but me up here, so I sit down. A young soldier climbs up and says he will take it. I said, "Nah, I got it, just tell me how to put the sucker in gear". So he does. Now, I have driven lots of things with pivot steer, so this doesn't worry me at all. We charge out at the speed of a fast melting glacier. I haul back on a lateral, and give er some gas!! And the engine seems to die. Or better said, lose power. I can hear some of you laughing now. Well, the young soldier jumps down, because he thinks I am stopping. I am looking around for something to push, pull, turn on or off, to make this pig go faster. People are now screaming at me, but I am hard hearing, and, well, everyone is screaming at me in WOC, so nothing new there. I cant find any reason this darn thing wont go fast, and about this time the screams get REAL loud and nasty. I look up. My dozer blade is about a foot and a half from the next dozer's blade. This is not good. So I do what any right minded person would do, let off the gas! All the sudden, this pig of a machine acts like its butt is on fire! The engine revs up and away we go! With a resounding metallic clang, my blade hits the other blade and breaks the blade mount off, and starts to push the other dozer off to the side. I have no earthly idea what is going on! I have tromped the darn gas pedal almost through the floor board, and let it back out, in the hopes it is just stuck, and it just goes faster!!

All the sudden, my least favorite person in the world, CW4 Ti******nen, (the School Commandant) is standing next to me screaming to "push your G** Da*n foot down on the pedal!" So I did. And the engine died down to an idle. The man didn't like me before all this transpired, and it sure didn't get better afterwards. After a loud, anger filled tirade, filled with words we cant use here, nor in church, he explained that a dozer gas pedal works the opposite way of a gas pedal on any other vehicle in the world. Well, how should I know? My punishment, was to NOT, REPEAT, NOT, drive anything else in the remaining 2 weeks of school. The guy simply didn't have any humor. I got my revenge later.
You just reminded me of a pretty good lapse of common sense I had once. I'm sure I've related this story elsewhere on SS even but it's too good to not bring up again.

Long story short, it involves my first time driving manual. First time driving manual was trying to roll start an M49A2 with bad batteries. Roll-starting attempt courtesy of a Zoom Boom. It didn't work. Why? Because yours truly was an IDIOT and held the clutch in the entire time!

(Again, this was how myself, as a post-millenial (b. 1997) even learned what a manual transmission even was).

The kicker? Soldier B and I switched places. My first time driving the Zoom Boom, I backed up tentatively. He yells out to me I have to be going TEN times that fast. So I give it gas- and lo and behold the accelerator jams. IN REVERSE.
 

Mos68x

Active member
825
30
28
Location
Seligman,AZ
I went out hunting with a friend, I had shot a buck but we didnt have room in the vehicle we used. So of course I went back with the 5T to go get it and the other one my buddy shot. Right near my buck was a deep wash, of course the buddy asked if it could handle crossing it so we didn’t have to go the “extra” 100m down the road. Of course I said yes and went straight into it...but didn’t come back out on it own power lol

2715B56B-775D-415E-9107-53874E5A8273.jpg0ED0B30C-74B7-46D3-897C-D15E8EE34ECE.jpg61CF9F75-C8C4-4CB1-A1C0-4B34BACAE1B8.jpgF50B600B-8731-41D9-9A8F-13655D306F71.jpg39694511-D022-490F-B897-B32A0A715DB9.jpg
 
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