Ok.
So, you have been feeding the relay 24 volts the way you always have done it.
Tonight I wanted you to jump between the stud with the blue wire, to ground(no need to remove any wires to do this).
Anyway, you indeed do have the wrong relay so that needs to be changed.
Then we can see what happens.
I'm concerned that you may have damaged the gp card when jumping 24v to the blue wire. When the control card functions, it switches the blue wire to supply ground, to activate the relay. So, if your controller card was ever working, you supplied 24v to the ground(output) of the card. If you never had the key on when doing this, you might be ok.